My Top 25 Most Played on iTunes. Wow, This Is Personal.

A-Punk	Vampire Weekend	98
Cheer It On	Tokyo Police Club	83
Wave Of Mutilation	Pixies	77
Pile Of Gold	The Blow	76
Stuck Between Stations	The Hold Steady	75
Crooked Teeth	Death Cab For Cutie	74
Something To Look Forward To	Spoon	71
Pardon Me	The Blow	70
Debaser	Pixies	70
Dig For Fire	Pixies	68
abel	the national	67
Stay Don't Go	Spoon	66
The Con	Tegan and Sara	65
My Valentine	Rhett Miller	62
The Way We Get By	Spoon	60
King of All the World	Old 97's	58
Your English Is Good	Tokyo Police Club	58
Fake Empire	The National	54
Smoke You Out	The Donnas	53
Chips Ahoy!	The Hold Steady	52
Jonathon Fisk	Spoon	52
Ray Charles	Old 97's	50
Bullet and a Target	Citizen Cope	49
Small Stakes	Spoon	49
My Doorbell	The White Stripes	49

I Write a Little Something About Almost Every Band in the Lollapalooza Lineup, Whether I Know Anything About Them Or Not

Radiohead SEE LIKE THREE POSTS BELOW

Rage Against the Machine I DIDN'T REALLY WANNA SEE THESE GUYS A FEW YEARS AGO, BUT NOW I WOULD BE INTRIGUED. FREE LEONARD PELTIER!

Nine Inch Nails JUDGING BY WHAT I SAW OF THEM AT WOODSTOCK 1994, THESE GUYS CAN TEAR SHIT UP EVEN IN FESTIVAL MODE. I HAVE SEEN THEM SEVERAL TIMES BUT NEVER OUTDOORS OR AT A FESTIVAL. HIGH PRIORITY.

Kanye West HE'S GONNA TAKE THE STAGE REALLY LATE THEN BREAK HIS MACBOOK AIR BLOGGING ANGRILY ABOUT FAN RESPONSE TO HIS TARDINESS. PASS.

Wilco NEVER GOT INTO THEM AS MUCH AS OTHERS, BUT THAT'S WHAT FESTIVALS ARE ALL ABOUT. I WOULD GIVE THEM A SHAKE, AND IF IT DIDN'T WORK OUT, I WOULD GRAB A TURKEY LEG AND GO SEE THE TING TING'S. JEFF TWEEDY DRESSES REALLY AWESOME.

The Raconteurs SAW THEM ABOUT THREE MONTHS AGO. AMAZING SHOW, AMAZING BAND. GREAT ROCK, NO PRETENSE. THEY JUST KILL.

Louis XIV THESE GUYS HAVE BEEN PLAYING REALLY SMALL CLUBS ON THEIR PAST COUPLE TOURS. SURPRISED THEY MADE IT ON THE BILL. SAW THEM OPEN UP FOR HOT HOT HEAT A FEW YEARS AGO AND THEY SANG ABOUT GETTING LAID. LIKE, THAT'S ALL THEY SANG ABOUT. THEY WERE PRETTY GOOD.

Love and Rockets THESE GUYS ARE GOOD. I WOULD SEND MY FRIEND TO THE STAGE AND HAVE THEM TEXT WHEN "SO ALIVE" CAME ON. IF IT DIDN'T SUCK, I WOULD HAVE THEM TEXT ME AGAIN WHEN IT WAS TIME FOR "NO NEW TALE TO TELL"

Gnarls Barkley WOULD WALK BY THE STAGE AND LOOK UP, BUT THAT'S ABOUT IT. I LIKE MY CONCERTS ROCK AND ROLL-Y OR HIP-HOP-Y. THESE GUYS AREN'T MUCH OF EITHER.

Bloc Party THEY ARE VERY PERCUSSIVE. ANOTHER BAND I DON'T MIND, BUT AREN'T MY CUP OF TEA. THINK TOKYO POLICE CLUB DOES MORE WITH A SIMILAR SOUND

The Black Keys I GET THESE GUYS MIXED UP WITH THE BLACK LIPS, BUT I THINK THEY ARE THE BLUES DECONSTRUCTIONISTS THAT DON'T HAVE THE PHRASE "BLUES EXPLOSION" IN THEIR NAME. I'M SEEING THEM IN TWO MONTHS. FAIRLY EXCITED.

Broken Social Scene THIS BAND IS FROM CANADA. I DON'T THINK THEY'RE GOING TO BE A PART OF MY LIFE EVER. JUST HAVE A FINITE AMOUNT OF TIME AND THEY'RE ONE OF THOSE BANDS THAT I HAVE HEARD ABOUT FOREVER AND JUST FEEL LIKE I MISSED.

Lupe Fiasco THIS GUY'S LIVE SHOW KICKS ASS. BEST HIP-HOP SHOW I HAVE EVER SEEN. LIVE BAND, ALL SONGS IN THE CONTEXT OF AN OVERARCHING STORY. REALLY GREAT SHOW. RAPPERS TEND TO SHIT THE PROVERBIAL BED IN CONCERT, SPECIFICALLY IN LARGE VENUES. LET'S HOPE HE PLAYS UP THE BEST ASPECTS OF HIS LIVE SHOW FOR A HUGE CROWD.

Flogging Molly YOU CAN'T NOT DOUBLE-FIST BEERS WHEN THEY ARE ON STAGE. THEY ARE A TON OF FUN. AND THE LEAD SINGER IS REALLY FUNNY.

Mark Ronson HE IS A DJ AND PRODUCER. HIS SISTER KISSES LINDSAY LOHAN. HE DOES A PRETTY BITCHIN' REMIX OF TOXIC FEAT. ODB, AKA BIG BABY JESUS, AKA DIRT MCGIRT. LIFE'S TOO SHORT FOR DJ'S AT THE EXPENSE OF LIVE MUSIC.

Cat Power FEEL LIKE IT ALREADY DOESN'T MATTER THAT I MISSED HER OR NEVER LISTENED TO HER SINCE SHE'S BEEN AROUND.

The National YES!!! STELLAR DRUMER, GREAT BAND. ONE OF MY 5 FAVORITE BANDS RIGHT NOW. IT WOULDN'T FEEL RIGHT IF THEY WEREN'T PLAYING AT NIGHT. I SAW THEY PLAYED THE BROOKLYN POOL PARTY A FEW WEEKS AGO. THAT'S KINDA FUCKED UP. I LOVE THE NATIONAL, BUT THEY WOULDN'T PLAY MY POOL PARTY.

G. Love & Special Sauce NOT MY THING, MAN.

Sharon Jones & the Dap-Kings HEY! IT'S THE FIRST BAND I'VE NEVER HEARD OF! I'LL PASS. YAY!

Explosions in the Sky THEY DO ALL THE MUSIC FOR FRIDAY NIGHT LIGHTS I THINK. I WOULD WANT TO JUMP OVER A PUDDLE IN SLOW MOTION WHILE THEY WERE PLAYING. THEN LOOK UP WITH SWEATY HAIR AND BROODING EYES. APPARENTLY, THESE GUYS ARE OPTIMAL FOR ME UNDER VERY SPECIFIC CIRCUMSTANCES. I WOULD TOTES CHECK THEM OUT.

Brand New I FEEL LIKE I SHOULD KNOW THESE GUYS, BUT WILL PLAY IT SAFE AND SAY I DON'T THINK I DO. HONESTY FEELS GOOD.

Gogol Bordello OH GOD YES. AWESOME SHOW, AWESOME SINGER. KICKING MYSELF FOR NOT HAVING CAUGHT THESE GUYS IN DALLAS A FEW MONTHS AGO. A GREAT FESTIVAL BAND, I WOULD THINK.

Stephen Malkmus & The Jicks WE'RE GONNA SLOW THINGS DOWN A BIT FOR COUPLES-ONLY SKATE. PAVEMENT TRULY IS MORE THAN THE SUM OF ITS PARTS.

Dierks Bentley I THINK THIS GUY HAS CURLY HAIR AND KINDA LOOKS LIKE ONE OF THE MEMBERS OF HOOTIE AND THE BLOWFISH. IF I'M WRONG, I WOULD LIKE TO APOLOGIZE TO EVERYONE. NO ONE COMES OUT ON TOP THERE.

Okkervil River I LIKE "OUR LIFE IS NOT A MOVIE OR MAYBE" A LOT. BUT I HEARD FROM THE CO-AUTHOR OF THIS BLOG THAT I SHOULD LEAVE THE TICKETS AT WILL CALL AND NOT BOTHER GOING. I ABIDED. WOULD DEF WALK BY THEIR SET TO SEE IF I NEEDED TO YELL AT MY CO-AUTHOR.

Amadou & Mariam THEY SOUND LIKE PEOPLE I WOULD BEFRIEND ON A CRUISE

Blues Traveler UNLESS THEY'RE REPRISING THEIR PERFORMANCE FROM THE END OF KINGPIN, OLD PENNSKI'S GONNA PASS.

John Butler Trio NAH, NOT FOR ME. THEIR NAME MAKES THEM SOUND REALLY BORING. DON'T HAVE TIME OR INCLINATION TO INVESTIGATE FURTHER.

Girl Talk I WOULD DEF CHECK THEM OUT ON THEIR NAME ALONE. PLUS I'VE READ A LOT ABOUT THEM RECENTLY. EASIER TO WALK BY THE STAGE AND CHECK THEM OUT THAN TO BORROW THEIR ALBUM. AND A BETTER BAROMETER FOR HOW MUCH I'LL LIKE THEM.

Your Vegas CAN'T IT BE OUR VEGAS?

CSS I HOPE CSS STANDS FOR SOMETHING. HAVE HEARD OF THEM, DON'T THINK THEY'LL MAKE MY TRIAGE LIST UNLESS I LISTEN TO THEM WHILE I'M HAVING AN AMAZING EXPERIENCE

Eli "Paperboy" Reed & the True Loves PROBABLY NOT THE SAME "PAPERBOY" WHO SINGS "THE DITTY". PROB NOT INTERESTED.

Battles WOULD CHECK THEM OUT. BEEN LOOKING FOR MORE ELECTRONIC MUSIC RECENTLY AND THE LANDSCAPE SEEMS TO BE RIFE WITH SOME PRETTY GOOD ELECTRONIC-CENTRIC BANDS OUT THERE.

Steel Train REGGAE. PROB NOT FOR ME.

Jamie Lidell
Bang Camaro
Butch Walker
The Blakes

Mates of State "MY ONLY OFFER" IS ONE OF MY SINGLES OF THE MONTH. OR LAST MONTH. IT'S A REALLY GOOD SONG. THANKS WHITNEY MATHESON OF POP CANDY FOR TURNING ME ON TO THEM. VERY DANCEABLE.

Tally Hall
Spank Rock
White Lies
Brazilian Girls
Magic Wands

Chromeo GREAT NAME FOR A BAND. WOULD CHECK THEM OUT. ALSO KINDA IN MY ELECTRONIC MUSIC WHEELHOUSE, FROM WHAT I HEAR. HAVEN'T HEARD THEM BUT WOULD CHECK THEM OUT.

Electric Touch
Duffy
Innerpartysystem

The Kills SAW THESE GUYS AFTER THEY FINISHED IN THE SMALL ROOM AT HOUSE OF BLUES AND CAME INTO THE BIG ROOM WHERE A VERY POPULAR DALLAS COUNTRY BAND (THE BOYS NAMED SUE) WAS PLAYING. IT LOOKED LIKE ROBERT SMITH AND WENDY O. WILLIAMS STEPPED INTO A HONKEY TONK. VERY FUNNY. SUPPOSED TO BE REALLY SEXY. HARD TO BE SEXY AT A FESTIVAL.

The Postelles
Rogue Wave
The Parlor Mob

The Go! Team THE FOX IS IN THE HENHOUSE! REPEAT: THE FOX IS IN THE HENHOUSE!

Bald Eagle
Mason Jennings
Krista
The Gutter Twins
Ha Ha Tonka
Yeasayer
Witchcraft

Grizzly Bear I LIKE "WHAT HAVE YOU DONE". I DON'T LIKE THEIR OTHER STUFF THAT MUCH. I WOULD BE HUNGOVER EATING DEEP DISH PIZZA WHEN THEY ARE PLAYING.

We Go To 11 NOT A TIMELY REFERENCE.

MGMT APPARENTLY THEY ARE THE HOT BAND WITH THE MTV CROWD. I DIDN'T KNOW THE MTV CROWD STILL LISTENED TO MUSIC.

Sofia Talvik
The Weakerthans
Booka Shade
Santogold

Black Kids I CONFUSE THEM WITH THE COOL KIDS, WHO ARE BLACK. VERY TRICKY STUFF
Black Lips

Dr. Dog I WOULD WATCH THIS CARTOON.

Nicole Atkins & the Sea SOOTHING.

The Ting Tings THESE GUYS ARE PRETTY GOOD, BUT I HAVE A REAL BEEF WITH IPOD COMMERCIAL BANDS. I'LL ADDRESS THIS IN A FUTURE POST.

Kid Sister
Office

The Cool Kids THEY SHOULD TEAM UP WITH BLACK KIDS AND SAVE ME A HEADACHE. I HAVE A REAL SOFT SPOT FOR SELF-AWARE RAPPERS, SO I WOULD TOTALLY SCOPE THEM OUT. AND THEY DRESS LIKE YOUNG MC DID.

What Made Milwaukee Famous AT THIS POINT I HAVE MADE A LITTLE GAME OUT OF LONG I CAN AVOID ACTUALLY HEARING THIS BAND. MOST PEOPLE WILL PROBABLY GO THEIR WHOLE LIVES. WHOA.

Does It Offend You, Yeah? I'M TRYING TO GET INTO THIS BAND BASED ON THEIR NAME, WHICH IS A REFERENCE TO THE BRITISH VERSION OF THE OFFICE. I HAVE A 60% SUCCESS RATE IN TRYING TO LIKE A BAND BECAUSE OF THEIR NAME. NOT BAD.

The Whigs
Manchester Orchestra
Foals
Uffie
The Octopus Project
Cadence Weapon
Ferras
De Novo Dahl
Noah and the Whale
Margot & the Nuclear So and So's
K'NAAN
Serena Ryder
Newton Faulkner ADD "SYNDROME" AND IT SOUNDS LIKE A HORRIBLE AFFLICTION

We Have the Facts and We're Voting Yes.

Not my article, but a good one nonetheless. Mine are generally funnier. And less informative.


Qdoba Versus Chipotle
Now that the McDonalds versus Burger King dialogue is old hat, the new argument is: Qdoba versus Chipotle. Which of these growing high-end fast food chains provides a better burrito experience?
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Bennigans Nationwide Closed Forever and Ever

Story here. Score one for the little guy! Except for all the little guys that were working at Bennigans. They're unemployed now. Score one for the food snobs! Yeah!

I actually have a soft spot in my heart for casual dining restaurants such as Bennigans, TGI Fridays, and Chili's. While they oughtn't (!) be the cornerstone of one's diet, I can't explain the majesty of seeing the Hard Rock Cafe sign over the horizon while I was incredibly "drunk" in Amsterdam. "Drunk" from all the "beer".

However the security blanket of casual dining is quickly becoming infected with the smallpox of rapid expansion, brand extension, and franchising. No longer can I trust the Chili's at the airport to compare with my fond memories of bland fajitas and overpriced chocolate milkshakes during my childhood. The Chili's at the American Airlines terminal in LAX betrayed me with awful, overpriced food. Really. Just overpriced shit.

"Penn, it's an airport eatery. What did you expect?"

First of all, you don't know me well enough to ask me that. Secondly, I expected the reliability and quality (don't laugh) associated with the Chili's name to supersede the craptacular consequences of not allowing knives and intelligent people to work past the security gates at an airport (prove me wrong, dipshits!).

this is what sadness looks like

Anyway, it seems that, somewhat unsurprisingly, casual food chains reached market saturation and whored their names out like common whores. The effect? Instead of mocking the concepts in good nature a la "Office Space", people just stopped going. It's one thing when your giggling self spies a Dutch Hard Rock with squinty little eyes. it's another thing when Joe Eighteen-pack realizes that he doesn't need to eat at Chili's for lunch cause HE'S NOT TRAPPED IN TERMINAL E, AND HE HAS A CHOICE. By expanding their brand into airports, restaurant chains practically beg patrons to connote the chain with something they are relegated to, rather than something they choose. In the Venn Diagram of dining, the overlap between the "restaurants at which I dine in airports" and "restaurants at which I dine when not in airports", the overlap is pretty damn small. In fact, I'm gonna say that the two circles are on distant sides of a giant canyon, waving at each other like idiots. And you have to take off your fucking shoes to get from one circle to the other.

Goodbye, Bennigans. Death by Chocolate it sadly wasn't.

Coming soon: How Applebee's Went from Being America's Largest Restaurant Chain to America's Largest Chain of Bus Stop Shelters!

Fuck yourself, Applebees.

"Constructive Summer" by The Hold Steady

My God! That Man's Head is a Radio!

After 4 rough days, long lines, and almost no sleep, I'm back from Comic-Con 2008. I really think it was the best one in recent memory. I can say without question that J.J. Abrams new show "Fringe" is going to exceed all expectations.

I would also like to say one more thing to all the haters out there that think Comic-Con has become co-opted by the mainstream media and now is mass marketed to all the entertainment buffs out there: The times they are a-changin'!!!!

My god, that was exhausting. And a lie. I didn't go to Comic-Con. And don't think I ever will. However, I feel that at least my attendance at the event would lend credibility to my blog and push it over that "5 reader hump" I've been hearing so much about. At most, it will get more web hits cause I've mentioned Comic-Con already like 4 times.

If you have read my blog post on the "chickens" of the music industry (see a couple posts below), then you'll realize I find this to be a divisive issue that has monopolized a disproportionate amount of my precious, precious time. Equally intriguing to me is the phenomenon of Radiohead. I don't particularly like Radiohead, but I guess I respect them because so many people I respect live and die by them. Radiohead's music has just never made that big an impression on me. But I certainly don't hate them. And many critics and friends share this sentiment with me.

as talented as he is retarded-looking

Which isn't a bad spot to be in. At best, you're worshiped (i feel there should be another "p" in "worshiped" but my spell-checker says otherwise. Moving on). At worst, you're respectfully dismissed with little prejudice. I guess if this was a blog about sports and music, then Radiohead would be Brett Favre. But you can't eat Brett Favre. Legally. So we'll have to find an analog more in line with the theme of this blog.

What food would Radiohead be?

If anyone read this blog, this could be a contentious issue. I will pretend people do read this blog and tread lightly to make myself feel important. Radiohead would be a "good" food. Not necessarily in terms of taste, but in terms of esteem. And divisive. They would not be a hamburger or a sno-cone. Radiohead also seems more ethereal than a simple "steak" or "lobster". That is to say, they are as much an indulgence as they are a meal.

My initial instinct was to make Radiohead foie gras. But foie gras is divisive in the wrong way. Foie gras is divisive because some people aren't thrilled with the idea of a goose having its feet nailed down to a board and being force fed via a beer bong until its liver swells up to roughly the size of a "The Real Ghostbusters" lunch box. This isn't what Radiohead is about. While I know very little about Radiohead, if I saw Thom Yorke lightly tapping nails into the webbed feet of our fine-feathered friends, my regard for Radiohead would travel south of respect into the depths of "bewilderment" or "abject horror". So they're not foie gras.

What they are is caviar. I don't like caviar. It tastes like exactly what it is - fish and eggs. Not only do I not mock the people who like caviar, but I envy them. I envy them cause caviar is so damn classy. Just like Radiohead. Caviar and Radiohead are both things I want to like, but just don't. Like New York City and Frisbee Golf. So it is said, so it shall be done. Radiohead is caviar. But not Beluga cause they aren't that elitist.


Speaking of caviar. I attended a soiree on Friday night and had an "edible cocktail". The name "edible cocktail" threw me for something of a loop, as I considered "edible" to be synonymous with "able to be put in your mouth". Considering I wasn't an Icelandic girl who insereted vodka into her system by other means during their 4 months of night, I didn't really see the need for specificity. It turns out that edible means "eatable". Shocking.

Which wasn't redundant. But it was a misnomer and a terrible lie. They were essentially little flavored Jello cubes. Blood Orange and vodka was innocuous enough. I then tried one that sounded repulsive, but I wanted to to try nonetheless in my continuing efforts to be super-classy. Vodka and Caviar. The Jello portion was clear and unflavored, save for the vodka taste. The inside was fish eggs.

This was definitely not an "edible cocktail". After some sucking and chewing on vodka flavored Jello, you get to the fishy middle. Stupid little fish eggs that I would find in my teeth for the next couple hours. It really just tasted like shit.

Besides serving as notice that I attend crazy-awesome parties, this story demonstrates that although I don't like caviar, I wanted to like caviar so bad that I subjected myself to flavor-terror in the hopes that something would change. And if going to a Radiohead concert was as easy as popping a bullshit vodka candy, I would try that too.

(And that my friends, is how you bring a story back home)

Until next time, keep your heads in the clouds and your cocktails potable.

Dining Soundtracks Vol. 1 - "(Untz) (Untz) (Untz) The Trendy Restaurant"

Right now, the thought of having to write extensively on any of the bands from the previous post makes the back of my eyeballs sting, so I'm postponing it for a day or two.

Very briefly, I would like to discuss one of the many intersections of music and food - music at restaurants.

I have studied the restaurant experience practically for virtually all my life and academically for much less, but haven't ever gotten a consensus or "answer" to how people like their music in restaurants.

Talking to one restaurateur in San Diego, he said that the most important thing is that diners feel the music, without really hearing it. This is obviously done with an emphasis on low-end frequencies and music sans vocals. You know the stuff. It sets the mood the same way a back-lit bar does - generically and somewhat effectively. Acid jazz, trip-hop, whatever. Zero 7 are the undisputed kings or queens of this vibe. Morcheeba would be a prince or princess. As certainly as you expect to hear elevator music while shopping or in an, um, elevator, you can expect to walk into a trendy hotel or restaurant and hear that hip, electronic music. See also, The Bird and The Bee, The Blow, Hot Chip, Mates of State, Postal Service, Sneaker Pimps, A Tribe Called Quest. These guys all gnereally keep the bpms up high enough to bring energy to a joint with out being outspoken enough to dominate the experience. Hence the "feel and not hear" phenomenon.

It's certainly prevalent. It's certainly not innovative. But it works pretty well. If you're gonna do something trite, you might as well make it agreeable and most importantly, put it in the background. Music is divisive. While I make fun of a band like Maroon 5 at every opportunity, as I said before they are pretty bland and inoffensive. And when you want the food and conversation to be the stars of the show, the lowest common denominator is a pretty good choice. Could you imagine if you were sitting down to a $75 per person meal and were subjected to T-Pain, Def Leppard, or Nirvana? If the restaurant got it right, it would probably be one of the best experiences of your life. If the restaurant gets it wrong, it probably ruins the meal. And what are the odds of nailing it for any given person? 5%? 10%?

Dining is often as much about your company as it is about the food. While atmosphere (music) is important, I would say playing to loud music in a restaurant is in an unwise gamble in almost all instances. And this is coming from someone who hates people and loves music.

Even if you exist in a market that is deep enough to embrace a weird combination like Punk and Sushi, or New Wave and French food, do you really think that people would want to experience the combination more than once. I have never been with anyone who intimated that they wanted the music turned up in a restaurant. Which leads me to believe that perhaps the McCool music playing in high-end, high-energy restaurants, doesn't just appeal to people from a preferential standpoint, but perhaps from a more base, psychological standpoint. Someone should do more research on the subject (Not it!).

The Original White Meats - U2, Coldplay, Dave Matthews

In an effort to give some insight into what we here at YHWYE are all about, allow me to share with you the impetus for this journal's creation. Someone somewhere (I think it was Anthony Bourdain) said that nobody takes chicken seriously as a dish anymore, because it's basically a default choice for people who a) cannot make up their mind, or b) just don't care. Which kinda makes sense when you consider how prevalent chicken dishes are on the menus of generic chain restaurants versus their prevalence on the menus of "better" (read: haughtier) restaurants. Chicken in our culinary landscape has become a vehicle for grease and cheese.

Not unlike Coldplay.

My awesome chicken story above is representative of my thoughts on many mainstream bands today. They are inoffensive stopgaps for people who either don't know any better or just don't care. Which makes them horribly, horribly offensive to many people who are passionate about music in the same fashion that a fluffy chicken breast covered in cheese and bacon is offensive to someone who is passionate about food.

Like almost everything to be discussed in this blog, the issue here is 100% a matter of taste, both literally and figuratively (neat!). Now I realize that if I was to hold both food and music in truly equal regard, I could pose the question, "What dish or restaurant would be the U2 of cuisine?". But that would sound completely more ridiculous than the question, "Which band is the cultural equivalent of chicken?" Which is a completely, unridiculous, valid question.

So I made a little list, as I'm wont to do from time to time. The criteria was essentially, "What are Whitey's favorite bands?". Who sells out arenas not with passionate fans, but with law firm luxury suites, and mouth-breathers clad in the trendiest fashions from two years ago? Who do Sex and the City fans like? What tickets are the most absurdly overpriced?

Those are the expanses of the search. Now time to filter. Clearly Pavarotti tickets are, by common standards, absurdly overpriced. (Note: I think Pavarotti might be dead, deeming all future Pavarotti tickets wildly overpriced). But his audience is discriminating and overwhelmingly rich. Fans of 311 are not either of these things. Streisand falls into the former category as well. Celine Dion and Barry Manilow straddle this line with remarkable grace.

Further, the decision of many to attend a concert or buy an album by these "chicken" bands is more cultural than musical. Which is a more prevalent phenomenon than I am willing to admit, if only because the cultural motives are relegations. Gotta go to two concerts a year, might as well be U2. Let's all pile into our Honda elements and 3-serieseseses and hear 'Beautiful Day' just like it sounds on the album!!! I'm upsetting myself. Let's move on.

Before the list, let me say that inclusion on this list does not constitute my passing judgment. Some of these bands I abhor, while some I simply mock. They are all incredibly palatable. Which is probably why I hate so many of them. One or two I might like. Try to guess. I think you'll be pleasantly surprised with the answer.

note - italicized bands have black members or fans

• U2
• Coldplay
• The Dave Matthews Band (black members, no black fans)
  
• Matchbox 20
  
• Snoop Dogg (one black member, many black fans)
• The Police (no black members, possible black fans)
• Maroon 5

That's all I got for now. Back to dive into the above bands in the next post.

In the interim - Who are your "chicken bands"? Indulge me in the comments section. And by doing so, indulge yourself.

The Power and The Fury, aka "Welcome!"

Why hello there! We didn't hear you come in! Forgive us if we don't shake your hand! Ours are all covered in Coldplay and marzipan!

Surfing the internet today, I noticed a paucity of websites that discuss two of my passions (food and music) in tandem. If you know of a bunch of really awesome sites that have been doing this for years, please keep them to yourself, as it would make me look like an asshole. I found websites, magazines, and TV shows that cater to way more esoteric topics in tandem, such as Punk Rock and Baseball (Chin Music), Hip-Hop and Cars (Dub), and Perverts and Children (Boys Life and Highlights).

Now you're probably saying, "Penn, those are published magazines. You guys write an unread blog on in a dusty corner of the internet. The comparison is hardly apt".

Fuck you. We are doing our best. Take your MySpace ass to the curb.

Anyway, without discussing too much the virtue and value of hospitality and entertainment that food and music provide, I feel that both food and music were ingredients, nay, requisites for 90% of the good times I have enjoyed these 28 years into life. The other 10% probably involved sex or rollerblading. To what extent these two (food and music, not sex and rollerblading) are tethered or involved with one another is certainly something we at YHWYE intend to explore. The extent to which these things may totally exist but we are unable to discuss in an organized, lucid manner is also unknown. But probably large.

We also really like making fun of things and being pretentious about food, but that's really just incidental to our nobler pursuit of that shit above. Will we always agree? No! Will it always be entertaining? Probably not! Will we keep doing it until we win you over? Doubtful, but we'll see!

So to all the friends, family, and weirdos out there: Hang on! It's gonna be an exclamatory ride!!!

How would you like it? Well Done.

How we got started:

P:what you got on your grill?
M:mainly chicken.

P:chicken is for people who can't make up their mind. It's the vodka tonic of the culinary world.

M: Who is the chicken of the Indie World?
P: Vampire Weekend.



If Music was Food....
coldplay and u2 are the chicken of the non indie music universe
nickelback is the undercooked chicken ridden with salmonella
kid rock is the fatty part of a salisbury steak - not the actual steak, but the gristle
Creed is the arby's.... you can actually get creed and nickelback as a two for two beef and cheddar
foo fighters are the pork chops
radioheaad is the big mac:you like it, even though you shouldnt because everyone likes it
can kid rock be the mcrib?
Tegan and Sara are an Oreo mcflurry
the raconteurs are In n' Out Burger....the usual food, but done way better than everyone elsecould spoon is chicken
tokyo police club are the pinkberry
death cab is seared ahi...a little better, but totally played out
The national are a decadent dessert you eat off a naked lover
Apples in stereo are ethiopian food
Mychemical romance is a slim jim
The pixies are black cod in a miso glaze
the talking heads are breakfst for dinner
mars volta are korean food. You wanna like it, you're supposed to like it, but just not that great....
andrew bird is succulent lobster
Queens of the Stone Age are red lobster
MGMT is the applebee's
black rebel motorcycle club is the burger joint on the corner
brian jonestown massacre is the tofurkey
green day is fridays at the airport
dan deacon is the corndog
postal service is tea and scones when it's raining
ghostland observeatory are the thundercloud subs...fucking amazing but you dont want them to expand outside of austin
rilo kiley is a tuna roll
mates of state is a turkey sandwich with avocado and mustard
french kicks are spaghetti and meatballs
ryan adams is taco bell. Sounds like a good idea but dissappoints EVERY FUCKING TIME!
Justice is subway, hot chip is quiznos. chromeo just sucks.
LCD soundsystem are the chipotle
fujiya and miyagi are the freebirds
presidents of the usa are smoothies
Britney spears is the chicken stuffed stix that rotate on metal logs at 7-11
avril lavigne is the sweaty hot dog rotating
good charlotte is the nacho at 7-11; pete wentz is the chili topping
eminem is the cheeseburger bite
the donnas are the hot dogs on hollywood at 2:30 am wrapped in bacon with onions and jalapenos
we are scientists are hummus and pita
arcade fire are indian. Good and satisfying, but absolutely no fun.
Sheryl Crow is funyons
TV on the Radio is a philly cheese steak
thievery corporation is shwarma
tom waits is jambalaya
the verve is chicken noodle soup
REM are english muffins. weird and not very necessary
pearl jam, coincidentally are like jam- sticky and reminds you of the past...
alice in chains is the peanut butter
nirvana is the bread holding that Grunge sandwich together
Dave matthews is now tuna casserole...something that seems dated, weird, and totally undesirable- Jack Johnson is the tuna salad. John Mayer ist he Hamburger Helper. Ben Harper is the Tuna Noodle Helper.
beatles are pizza, stones are mac and cheese
stones are one note but beatles change from day to day
the monkees are the craft mac and
bruce springsteen is stoufers french bread pizza cause he burns the roof of your mouth EVERY GODDAMN TIME!
bon jovi is the ramen noodle soup- chicken flavored.



P: albums come out on tuesdays...the wed or thursday before an album comes out, we each write a review based on our preconcieved notions, then teh type of food we EXPECT it to be. Then on tuesday or a couple days after, we write an actual review and the food the album is.

P:we can talk about our meals and compare them to.....wait for it....BANDS-SO IT WORKS BOTH WAYS
"this cracker tastes like natalie merchant's solo work